Parental support is essential for developing communication and also in discerning and articulating emotional states and needs.
Regulating one’s own emotions is a lifelong process, which involves self-regulation and the development of an increasing capacity to tolerate emotions. In order to facilitate this development, parents allow their infants to experience emotions but intervene to protect them from being overwhelmed by excessively intense or prolonged emotions. Even from an early age, learning to contain and appropriately express emotions is learned from the caregiver and peers both by direct intervention (e.g. the management of tantrums) and vicariously (e.g. observation of adults and peers emotional responses to situations).
Enhancing coping skills is one of the most important contributory factors in the development of emotional competence in children.
If children have been adequately attuned to, then they will develop into individuals who accept themselves readily. They will be able to challenge inappropriate behaviour in compassionate and confident ways, and be realistic about their achievements and shortcomings. There will be self-reflection and healthy self-questioning. They will not be dependent on the judgement of others, but opened to receive the opinions of others.
Things to do with your children to develop their emotional literacy: Respond to your child’s emotions when they are upset, excited or worried. Tell them it’s ok to be upset or it’s great that they are excited and talk about why they feel that way. (You can tack on a bit at the end about what would be the best way of behaving when we feel that way).
Talk to them about how they feel in different situations and take opportunities to talk about how others feel, use in pictures, books, TV etc.
by Sylvia Milford